August 3, 2012

The Transitional Game.

While I've been here snapping photos and whipping up blog posts so far and few these days, I've been playing the transition game pretty hard. So many changes; unexpected and expected have happened in the past seven months that it seems kind of unreal. Most of the time I find myself thinking that I'm doing well in my life, other times I'm wrapped up in discontent. I feel like a lot of my transitions are good, but with varying impacts. There are those ones that you expect throughout your life; like high school, leaving home, college, and then there are ones that rail hard into you unexpectedly, leaving you emotionally mangled. Or the kind where you see it coming and you try your best to avoid it. Then it happens and you're stuck. This just feels like such an odd time in my life; where the age already represents change and growth  and then having to propel it and then deal with the unexpected at the same time just seems like no easy feat. However, many of millions have glossed through 24 real nicely and turned out just fine, so maybe it's not all that bad. It's just the fact that decisions are not so basic anymore. Almost all decisions seem like big decisions; school, no school, work, more work, more money, commitment...uhhh? It's like one of those things or situations (TANGENT!) when you're getting ready, but you're looking for the right thing to emulate, your inspiration; the way you want to carry yourself for the evening. You find it and you tell yourself that you're going to pull it off, and you walk into the party and immediately forgot all about the other vibe you wanted to pull off because you is the only thing you can do best. It seems like I just keep telling myself that I will find all these cool things and add them into my life to compose some sort of career, something substantial and supportivesaying that I'm gonna pull it all together... and then I just go back to being me, doing the same initial thing I found myself trying to tweak before. I find myself doing the same shit, tolerating the same lame day to day, and just unsure of when something's gonna really h a p p e n. Ya know? I feel that I have all these things I could put to use, but just don't know how yet. I think I just have to go for something and leap.

Sometimes I'd like to think that the people who figure it out a little bit later just have more to prove. I feel like  I've done okay for myself, but I haven't quite proven myself yet. I feel like there's something big in store, and now I gotta find it and make it all happen.

I'm pretty adaptable. Actually, I'd like to think that I'm adaptable as all hell. However, adaptation gets harder as you get older, as you learn more about yourself, certain things just seems to get harder, and certain things absolutely get easier. Funny how that works... Uh oh. I'd better stop this thought in it's tracks. I'm just in such a state of transitional configuration that it's a constant head spin. I never know where to go next, I feel there is definite fear in the daily regime these days and that just seems silly. Here's to living life and breathing whilst doing it. That's all I can say about this. ON TO THE PICTURES!

cupcakes / special flavors we've had recently

shots of the sky all day every day! Updrafts have a special place in my heart.


we had some events in the afternoon that involved some drinky drinky, and then we headed
over to the neighborhood pool and hung out for a bit before going to dinner. We realised that
we are a decade strong this year in our friendship, so that's pretty awesome.

Me next to a glorious shot on radar. What a tasty little storm!

My work station.

One of my favourites to make. Rainbow cupcakes are pretty tops
and leave your hands in a fun little mess...

 I went to the pool. Again later in the week. I thought I could gracefully hop a set of bushes,
and then there was a curb, and my foot rolled forward over it. It was absolutely horrid.
At first I thought I was fine, but now it has been inhibiting me for nearly a week. Time for this shit
to heal.

Charlie Brown found a pinecone!

Havin' a fag and enjoying some coffee on the back porch.

drew this a year or so ago. I kind of dig it, it hangs on my wall.

No matter what, these two things can pretty much always bring a smile to my face.
Pizza and Florence - especially this remix.

Goofin' at work when weighing out butter. The knife blends in all too well, but no worries, I'm armed!
Of course, I always set up my little measuring spoons arsenal each morning.

So my foot injury allocated some odd coordination...
I ended up having to match my outfits or work around them based on what slippers I had.
These guys were pretty rad.
outfit I wore to the city this past Tuesday.

One of my best friends came into town from New York +
brought her boyfriend back with her. He had never been to
Portillo's. It was fun company and fantastic food-as always.

Ah, just like the old days. I hung out with my buddy Adam yesterday +
he pulled out a pack of cards for us to play Egyptian Ratscrew just like the old days.
We used to sit at this coffee shop for hours and play. Yesterday, after not doing that
in five years, it happened again. That was righteous.

Things have been going well, just inconvenient because of my foot. I've been able to still get around and do what I need to do for the most part. I'm getting more and more saddened to see summer on it's way out. I have Lollapalooza that I'm going to tomorrow and Sunday. I do indeed have a three day pass, but the unfortunate circumstance lies in the issue that if I go tonight to see all the bands that I've seen twice before already, my foot will be in bad shape for the bands I long to get a glimpse of and hear live. So I have a lot to anticipate! I AM GOING TO SEE MY QUEEN perform this Sunday- FLORENCE + THE MACHINE! 5th show, baby! Beyond revved. Really, really, REALLY wish I was going to see The Black Keys tonight though...



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